I decided that since I survived swimming in shark infested waters, I might as well go ahead and start conquering some of my other fears, but keeping with the general theme of “Things That Can Eat Me.”
Off we went on a 1-day safari to one of the private game reserves a few hours outside of Cape Town. Much smaller than the prom queen of South Africa (Kruger National Park), but offering a good viewing of the Big 5, and frankly, more than enough of mother nature to satisfy my appetite. Upon meeting our ranger, I quickly asked him where he’s sitting, because I want to be next to the gun. He informed me that there are no weapons. No tranquilizer guns. Nothing. How do you fight off a lion with your bare hands? He sure as hell didn’t look like a Masaii Warrior to me.
So I generously offered up the “window seat” to everyone else, thinking a nice and meaty human barrier would at least offer some protection.
I won’t post our entire animal collection, but just a few of my favorites, starting with the pleasantly plump HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS. Remember that game? I still have an affinity for hippos based on my childhood competitive outlet, despite the fact that hippos kill more people on this continent than sharks, lions, and crocodiles combined. (Just wanted to prove that I did pay attention to our guide.)
Then the cool looking zebras, white rhinos, and the very ornry-looking buffalo. The ranger told us that the buffalo is the most unpredictable animal and will charge without any warning. Just look at that face. He is pissed at the world!
The elephants were just adorable.
The lions actually never showed their faces, which I didn’t complain about one bit. The ranger was bound and determined to find them, and we patiently crept around in our Land Rover, everyone quiet as a mouse. I couldn’t help but think how stupid this was, and was just dying for him to give up and take us back to herbivore safety. I’m totally cool with the plant-eating giraffes, thank you very much. He finally gave up, but we were able to see the lions that were a part of their rescue project, which were behind electric fences, THANK GOD. Trust me, the photos would not have been so great otherwise, since it’s hard to take a picture if you’re curled up at the bottom of a Land Rover in the fetal position.
Then, with the scent of elephant dung still likely clinging to our clothes, we headed straight to the oh-so-lovely town of Stellenbosch, known for it’s gorgeous estates and fab wineries.
South African wine is really good, and you can get some amazing wine for a fraction of the price in the US. I like to be an informed consumer, though, so I was very serious with my “research.” I love how we went from wild animals that can eat you to fine wines within hours. This country is awesome.
3 Responses
Stay in touch with the conversation, subscribe to the RSS feed for comments on this post.
COOL, Looks way better than Disney’s Animal Kingdom. And I didn’t get to sample any Vino.
Remember, you don’t have to outrun the lion, just outrun the other people.
Awesome pictures! Hippos freak me out. Big time. They don’t look like they can do much – but they can come at you like a spider monkey!
Ahhh….that wine looks wonderful!! South African wines are some of my fave!!
Zebras are my favorite! and I loved Hungry Hungry Hippo….lol…I wonder if that game has gone obsolete cuz the little marbles are a choking hazard…. dude I want to go on a safari!